Secret Six: Bats and Demons
by Bagna the Irate Supervillain
Summary: After being hired to rob Talia al Ghul, the Secret Six find themselves in Gotham City fending off heroes and villains alike with their mysterious client nowhere to be found.  Scandal, Catman, Deadshot, Ragdoll, Bane, Jeanette
1. Chapter 1

Scandal Savage woke up early and got out of bed, careful not to wake Liana. She put on her slippers and bathrobe over her pajamas and went to the kitchen looking for milk and cereal. One of Talia al Ghul's ninjas had gotten a lucky attack during their last outing, and regrowing organs always left Scandal unusually hungry. She noticed that somebody (she arbitrarily chose to blame Deadshot) had used up the milk and then put the jug back in the fridge. Annoyed, she walked out to get some more milk at the supermarket.

Scandal's annoyance with Floyd Lawton was diminished when she thought of how quickly he had gunned down the ninja who had gutted her, and how effectively he had provided covering fire as Bane had carried her out, violently dispatching any ninja-bats who got too close. As she was getting back from the store, a familiar group of neo-Nazis known as the Zyklon-B Brothers noticed her and began driving behind her in their car, discussing how best to use her to settle their grudge against Deadshot. Scandal took a moment to regret walking around without her lamentation blades, and realized that she was still weak enough from the fight with Talia's ninjas that the normally laughable Zyklon-B Brothers could actually delay her. Annoyed, Scandal glared at the brothers as they approached. The look on her face proved sufficiently frightening that the brothers promptly threw away their guns and drove away; commenting as they left that following their targets to Gotham had not been a wise idea.

Scandal arrived with the milk and a bag full of guns she had gathered from the Zyklon-B Brothers. Upon her arrival, Scandal found Bane looking at her disapprovingly. "Scandal Savage, you should not go out in those slippers when you are supposed to be recovering," said Bane. Scandal pretended she hadn't heard him and continued into the kitchen to put away the milk.

Deadshot, Jeanette, and Liana were already sitting around the table, while Catman cooked eggs in the kitchen. As Scandal put the milk in the fridge, Catman turned to address her. "I can endure almost anything," said Catman, "But waiting in this crummy Gotham apartment for our mysterious employer to contact us is going to drive me crazy. I don't like sitting on Talia al Ghul's property any longer than we have to."

"I agree with the kitten," Deadshot said from across the room. "Gotham City has been a lot less welcoming since The Bat disappeared. I can't cross the street anymore without killing a dozen muggers. Also, why do we always take jobs from these anonymous types? We've been getting screwed over consistently since we went into business together."

"As someone who calls himself 'Deadshot,' I'm sure you can appreciate the desire of most supervillains to keep their identities private," said Scandal. "We finish the jobs we take. That's the only way this arrangement works. Of course, it would also help if _someone_ were to stop putting milk back in the fridge when it's empty."

"Getting upset over small annoyances is exactly the sort of thing that will drive this team apart, darling," said Jeanette. "I'm confident that whoever left the empty carton in the refrigerator was simply being absentminded."

"All that I'm saying," Deadshot said, "Is that I don't trust any clients when I can't put a name to their face. A name, or possibly just a bullet. Speaking of 'small annoyances,' how did anyone think that bringing a civilian with us was a good idea?"

"I'm sitting right here," said Liana. "Maybe I should remind you that I'm the one who arranged the Gotham apartment. Do you have any idea how hard it was to get an apartment this close to downtown without notice? There's no way I'm going to stay away and let you all trash the place."

"Besides," Liana said, looking affectionately at Scandal, "If I'm going to take a vacation I might as well spend it with someone I like."

At this point Bane made his presence known, strategically positioning himself between Scandal and Liana. "We should prepare for today's tasks," said Bane. "What is Ragdoll doing?"

"When I walked by his room, it sounded like he was talking to his stuffed Parademon," replied Catman. "I don't really want to know what he's doing in there. I can't believe he brought that thing with him."

"At least he's keeping himself occupied," said Deadshot. "I'll need a stuffed Parademon of my own to talk to if I have to spend any more time here. I really need for something exciting to happen."

As if on cue, the door was kicked open, revealing Batman and Robin standing in the doorway.


	2. Chapter 2

"You may not realize it, but you two are exactly what I was hoping for," said Deadshot, pulling out a pistol and training it on Batman and Robin from across the room.

"We're not here to fight," responded Batman.

"Is breaking down people's doors how you usually behave when you don't want to fight?" asked Catman.

"If we wanted to fight, the six of you would already be dead," said Robin. Batman discreetly gave Robin a look of disapproval which Robin didn't seem to notice.

Bane responded, "I see that you possess much of your father's spirit, little one. It would be lamentable if you were killed before you have the chance to learn proper respect for your betters."

"Why are you two coming after us in the morning anyway?" asked Scandal. "Isn't it after your curfew?"

"We're not here to fight," Batman repeated, "We're here to deliver a mess…" Before Batman could finish speaking, Ragdoll dropped from the ceiling and began trying to wrap his limbs around Batman.

"I'm sorry. Being attacked from above must be a terribly alien experience for you. I apologize," Ragdoll said.

Batman was in the process of tying Ragdoll's arms and legs in knots to avoid getting crushed when Bane grabbed Ragdoll by the head and lifted him off Batman. "Allow The Bat's successor to speak," Bane ordered.

"Now that I have your attention," said Batman, "I'm here to tell you that Talia al Ghul is in Gotham, and she's brought Slade Wilson and an entire army of bat-ninjas with her."

"We've dealt with Talia and Slade before," said Scandal. "We already knew we were risking a fight with her."

"I don't really care whether you six can handle Talia al Ghul or not. Gotham City has been having enough trouble recently without armies of ninjas flying overhead. I won't allow you to have this fight in my city."

Scandal replied, "What makes you think you can stop us from operating in Gotham City?"

"We can stop you from operating anywhere," said Robin.

"You don't realize how much force is organized against you. After the recent chaos, everyone's determined to prevent Talia al Ghul from destroying Gotham," said Batman.

"You think we care about a group of superpowerless vigilantes?" said Talia.

"That's not really fair. We're mostly superpowerless villains," said Ragdoll.

"That's not true," said Catman. "You, Scandal, and Jeanette all have powers."

"Unfortunately, the government doesn't recognize surgery addiction as a superpower. Don't think I haven't petitioned," said Ragdoll.

"You've been warned once," said Batman. "You can leave Gotham by choice, or be forced out." With that, Batman left the apartment.

"By the way, large one," said Robin, "You broke my father's back once. I'll be seeing you again very soon." Robin followed after Batman.

"Well," said Jeanette, "It was very polite of them to deliver that warning in person."

"We seriously need to find a better hiding place if we don't want random superheroes visiting us," said Catman.

"It's worse than you think," said Scandal, "I saw the Zyklon B Brothers following us when I got milk this morning."

"Those clowns tracked us?" said Deadshot. "This is just embarrassing. Also, aren't they dead?"

"I suppose I should throw them harder next time," said Jeanette.

"Perhaps we should be more worried about Talia al Ghul and Slade Wilson," suggested Catman.

"I don't think so," said Deadshot, "Anyone who goes around calling himself something like 'Deathstroke' is clearly compensating for some serious insecurities."

"I couldn't agree more," said Ragdoll.

"We need to be more proactive about this situation," said Scandal. "Bane, you used to control Gotham. Call in whatever contacts you have left from those days and see if we can find out where Talia al Ghul is. If we can hit her first, she might decide that this precious belonging of hers isn't worth the trouble to retrieve."

"Speaking of which," said Liana, "Should we really have that sitting in the kitchen like that? I know it's inside a briefcase, but it seems inappropriate."

"I can contact Bird and Zombie," said Bane, "But I do not imagine that they will be cooperative."

"We can make them cooperate," said Scandal. "Let's send Talia a message."


End file.
